Little Johnnys
Little Johnny’s teacher wanted to see how much US history her kids knew. She decided to use famous quotes and ask who said them, and what year.
She started with “Four score and seven years ago”
No one in the class raised their hand except a Japanese boy who had just immigrated, she called on him and he answered “Abraham Lincoln 1863”
She gave the next quote “Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country”
Again no one but the Japanese boy “John Kennedy 1961”
The teacher was getting frustrated and admonished the class about not knowing any history, while this recent Japanese immigrant knew all the answers.
From the back of the class someone shouted “fuck the Japanese”
The teacher asks “who said that?”
Johnny replies “Harry Truman 1945”
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A teacher story..........
Michael, If you were on a date, having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the rest room?" the teacher asked.
"Just a minute, I have to go pee", he said.
The teacher replied,"That would be rude and impolite. What about you Paul, how would you say it?
"I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom, I'll be rightback."
The teacher responded,"That's better, but it's still not very mannerly to say the word 'bathroom' at the table."
"And you Johnny, are you able to use your intelligence for once and show us your good manners."
I would say: "Darling, may I please be excused for a moment, I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to meet after dinner."
The teacher fainted.
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Little Johnny was in class one day, and the teacher was going over a vocabulary lesson. The word of the day was "beautiful".
The teacher said "Okay, Michael, can you use the word beautiful in a sentence?"
Michael replied: "My uncle just bought a beautiful, brand-new sportscar."
The teacher turned to Suzy and asked her the same question.
Suzy replied: "My mother bought a new dress and she looked beautiful in it."
The teacher somewhat hesitantly turned to Little Johnny and asked him to use the word "beautiful" in a sentence.
Johnny replied: "The other night at dinner, my older sister told my father she was pregnant, and my father said 'Beautiful, just fucking beautiful!' "
She started with “Four score and seven years ago”
No one in the class raised their hand except a Japanese boy who had just immigrated, she called on him and he answered “Abraham Lincoln 1863”
She gave the next quote “Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country”
Again no one but the Japanese boy “John Kennedy 1961”
The teacher was getting frustrated and admonished the class about not knowing any history, while this recent Japanese immigrant knew all the answers.
From the back of the class someone shouted “fuck the Japanese”
The teacher asks “who said that?”
Johnny replies “Harry Truman 1945”
---------------------------------------------------------
A teacher story..........
Michael, If you were on a date, having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the rest room?" the teacher asked.
"Just a minute, I have to go pee", he said.
The teacher replied,"That would be rude and impolite. What about you Paul, how would you say it?
"I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom, I'll be rightback."
The teacher responded,"That's better, but it's still not very mannerly to say the word 'bathroom' at the table."
"And you Johnny, are you able to use your intelligence for once and show us your good manners."
I would say: "Darling, may I please be excused for a moment, I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to meet after dinner."
The teacher fainted.
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Little Johnny was in class one day, and the teacher was going over a vocabulary lesson. The word of the day was "beautiful".
The teacher said "Okay, Michael, can you use the word beautiful in a sentence?"
Michael replied: "My uncle just bought a beautiful, brand-new sportscar."
The teacher turned to Suzy and asked her the same question.
Suzy replied: "My mother bought a new dress and she looked beautiful in it."
The teacher somewhat hesitantly turned to Little Johnny and asked him to use the word "beautiful" in a sentence.
Johnny replied: "The other night at dinner, my older sister told my father she was pregnant, and my father said 'Beautiful, just fucking beautiful!' "
posted by Mikey B. at 9:15 PM
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